Saturday, March 28, 2009

It just gets better

So while I am out having lunch with Kile on Thursday, I get a phone call from my ex. His VM says that he is done and that I need to get our daughter by this weekend. Seems that she was on restriction for having a bad progress report and when her boyfriend came to take her to church, she was told she couldn't go. Well, she went. Hence my phone call. He proceeds to say that Lisa (stepmom) is already packing Alex's stuff.

Now I got majorly pissed as what the hell am I supposed to do? Especially since this is the day after the robbery and I had just finished telling all about it, then this happens. I call Alex to find out what's going on. She says she can't go back to a place she's not wanted. I say okay, give me a few minutes and I'll call you back. I look at Kile and he says let's go. Of course I am crying again 'cause this is just too much.

We get out to where she's at and I call Daryl. Wow, we talked ahem, yelled at each other for almost an hour. We go back and forth about what's going on. I tell him I am not saying that what Alex did was right, it's not. But what I am angry about is the fact that he told her to leave. I ask him if that is what he truly wants. He says no, but that Alex made her decision. I say, but you are the adult, the parent. Also, you cannot threaten me with this and not expect me to react. I have my friend here with a truck and I am ready to take her stuff now.

He says that's not how he wants this to go. I say I don't either, but you have to make a choice. He says he is not choosing Lisa over his kids. I said I never said that you did. I meant about the living situation. I know what's been going on. I've seen it. I put him on speaker and Alex talks to him too. Turns out that they (Lisa and Daryl) have been trying to get Alex to talk to a shrink about her problems.

I blow up at this, asking him why aren't you talking to her? He says well, I don't want to hear about her friends. I told him it's part and parcel the same thing. If she feels comfortable enough to tell you about her friends, then it will come down to her issues. Don't you get it? Then Alex pops up with that she has been feeling depressed and suicidal. He glosses it over like it's nothing. Uh yeah, that may be teenage angst, but I am taking no chances.

I ask again what he wants to do now. He says that it's Alex's decision and that Lisa has already packed half her stuff. I say and you're okay with that? He says yes. I say okay then, obviously the choice has been made. He is not happy, but has to deal with it. I lost it and I finally say what has been on my mind. And I am not alone. I told him you realize what's happening. She has done everything possible to poison you against your kids. And it worked. Alex says to him again about what it's like in the house, how Lisa ignores her and hides in the bedroom.

He says oh so now Lisa is the whole problem? I say no, but you no longer listen to the kids. And you promised that would never happen. That they are first in your life. He says that is still true. I say not from where I'm standing. He says what do you want from me? I say a home for our daughter that welcomes her and is not a place she has to worry about losing. Where she feels safe.

He says well, maybe that place is with you. I say maybe it is. He calms down and says all right. Then we will figure something out to help take care of her. I say okay, and by the way I will never put the kids against you. It's on you to keep a good relationship with them. He says we will talk soon and I hand the phone to Alex. They talk for a few more minutes and I hear her say I love you Dad.

We get to the house and Jack is waiting. I had asked Kile to call him to meet us at the house. Now I am still in the mindset of maybe we can just take her for a few days and maybe smooth it over. We go in and there are boxes, boxes, boxes in the front room. And Lisa is nowhere to be found. We walk into Alex's room and 95% of her stuff is gone. Oh, so that's what is in the boxes. That pissed me off again. It was only 3 hours! Between the first VM and all the discussion on the phone.

Obviously, someone saw a major opportunity, didn't they? I found out later that a lot of it was stuff Lisa had placed into boxes after the restriction happened. Alex's PS2, her stereo, various items of value. Oh, and her cell was taken away as well. Alex was told she wouldn't get any of these things back until there was proof of bringing up her grades. Okay..I can understand putting it away, but boxing it up and sealing it? Yeah, no forethought there.

Alex had to go out to the backyard where Lisa was to get her phone. Now she didn't say goodbye to Alex or anything when we left. Oh, well. So now Alex is living with us. Yes, 3 months ahead of schedule. Arrgh. She is going finish her year out at her high school. It's going to be tough, but as always we'll make it work.

The only thing that is a mess right now is that I don't really foresee Daryl giving me any money to help me. When I asked, he said that at the moment, he was sending enough to help pay the rent and that Lisa was buying the food. So I would have to talk to her. Oh hell no. What makes you think I am going to discuss anything with that woman? This is your child, not hers. She doesn't care.

He said that once Lisa has moved up to where he's at, it should be easier to send something. But that he wouldn't know until everything was settled. But you know what? I will make it work. Thank goodness I have Jack or I would be insane at this point. And Kile too. I apologized so much that night. Thank you for what you did. I really appreciate it.

I am looking at this as a new adventure!!! Together, we can do it.

No comments: